#004 Insights as an amputee

16th October 2020
For all my life I never thought I would be using the word ”amputee”. As a matter of fact, I had trouble with using it even after I lost my leg.
Not because I denied the fact or couldn’t cope with accepting my new situation and the loss of my leg. The word just felt so weird and I couldn’t relate to it.

That’s when I realized.

It is not the word by itself giving me a hard time. It´s putting myself in what feels like a box, that makes me very uncomfortable. The box do not hold space to be truly myself and I feel compromised, so that’s why I do not want to label myself.

But … society has its own way of organizing, labelling and creating easy ways to efficiently communicate what one means. So yes, after all I needed to start using it for others sake. Not necessarily for mine. What became important?

Continue staying grounded in my own core values and just use the word to communicate easier. It might sound like a compromise, but I will tell you how it is not.

I don’t take it personally anymore.

I took a decision already nine years ago on how I would like to see myself and how I’d like to label myself. Amputee was not my word of choice. I had problem using it and I understood that I had to improve my relationship to the word. I took it way to seriously and way to personal. In the beginning I felt like it would define me and compromise me as a human being and this I certainly didn’t want! So I had to work on the relationship to it. 

So what does really amputee mean?

It simply means ”a person who has had a limb amputated” or as Cambridge neatly writes it: ”A person who has had an arm or leg cut off” (which honestly is a very explicit and rough explanation, haha)

So I could agree to the meaning to the word.

It's also the politically correct word to use for someone who has undergone and amputation.

I could agree on that one too.

Photo Kelli McClintock

So the problem doesn’t really lie within the word, the obstacle is the emotion it’s causing me.

I feel Compromised.

Working with emotions can feel like entering a new space where basically the lowest and highest levels are in constant fight of attention. It may make you feel totally out of control and vulnerable to the present.
If I allow myself to step into that feeling for a short moment, being compromised. From this space I ask myself if there is another emotion I’d rather feel that would give me a sense of energy, harmoni and balance?

Oh yes.

I much rather feel Unlimited! The taste of that is so much greater and more fun.

Okey. Is it possible to feel Unlimited and at the same time use the word amputee? (you don’t need to label yourself therefore!) 

I thought about it for a little and came to the conclusion: Yes it is for sure possible.

This great life lessons taught me:

- You can detach what you feel about a certain word and redesign it by consciously choosing another one! By that you will create a new meaning and experience of a situation.

So even if you feel uncomfortable about being labelled as ”young”, ”old”, ”unexperienced”, ”divorced”, ”single” etc. Remember, it’s rather simple to detach that negative emotion and replace it with a new greater one that makes you feel good.

Today when I use the word amputee it gives me a feeling of being Unlimited.

This is just a tiny shift you also can make in your life in order to create a whole new experience and improve your way of living, try it! I encourage you to it!

I know it might be tricky to try this on your own, so if you feel you would need a bit support to make it happen. Reach out to me for a coaching session and we make it happen!